We are two adult people, we both have hopes and dreams which we don't share anymore. The one, or rather, the three things we share are named Alexander, Stefan, and Rebecca. I've come to a decision after long and painful sleepless nights, after many tears and much soul searching. I can't live like this anymore and neither can you. I guess we both have known this for the longest time, neither of us wanted to take the first step and that didn't help much.I'm tired Axel, very tired, and so are you. Let's not hurt each other anymore.
I want a separation.
Here are my terms, please read them carefully, once you've read them, I would like for us to sit and talk and behave as civilized human beings, for the sake of our children and our ten years together.
I'm going out now. I will be back when you are done reading this and thinking it over. I hope we can come to an agreement. I hope we can leave ourselves out of this and think of our children and of the times we shared together, which have been many and good. I'll always love you Axel, I want us to be able to talk and live our lives without anymore pain. You have been a good husband and you are a good father. Things just don't work out the way we would like them to sometimes. I will help you caring for our children and with anything else you may need. I will always be here for you and them, I want you to know that. I wish you happiness.
- I cannot take responsibility for our children. Both you and I know that. I've decided you should have custody of them, you are a good father. You are devoted and caring and you are a good provider.
- I would like to see them once o twice a week and to have them with me every other weekend. I would like to feel I'm free to see them, with your permission, as much as I can. We can talk about holidays and vacations if you want, right now I haven't thought about that yet, I'm still trying to get used to the fact that I want be with them every day.
- I would like us to talk to them together and explain that we have decided we need a separation, that we do not love each other anymore and that our lives together makes no sense I would like for their sake, that we could do this as civilized as possible.
- I will look for an apartment and a job and as soon as I find them I will leave. I will take my clothes, my car, books, and other stuff with. We can talk about that if you want, I won't need much.
- I want half of the money we have in Sweden, half of the money we have here and the total of my insurance policy. I calculated that I should have around $35,000. I will open a bank account to my name this week and I would like you to deposit the money there before the end of this month.
- While I look for a job and an apartment, I hope we can share the house and the children, behave like adults, talk to each other in friendly terms and not fight or discus. I will avoid you as much as possible, as I hope you do me, but when the children are around I would like us to t least be friends.
- I will need your help, although I don't know for sure, with signing a lease for an apartment. I don't have any credit not job history of my own, so I'll probably need a co-signer for that. I hope you will be willing to help me with that. I do not plan to ask you for monthly support or anything like that, but until around Christmas I am going to need your help. By then I hope I will be settled in and with a job, just enough to pay for my living expenses and my school.
- If next year you decide to move back to Sweden, we will have to make this separation legal so as to facilitate both our lives. The idea of loosing my children is physically painful, I beg you try and stay here until I'm finished with school.
- Once I'm done with school I will try to be as close as possible to the children. In the meantime, I have to agree to whatever conditions you set. Please don't take them away from me. I understand that you have to choose what ever is better for you and them, but also understand my pain and fears. Understand my love for them. Please understand that doing this is breaking me apart and yet I know I have to do it. Maybe you were right all along, maybe I'm not cut out for family life, one thing I do know is that if you take my children away from me I will not be able to make it. Please don't be cruel.
In the court hearings she says that I have tampered with this proposal and that she would never abandon her children. The truth is that I refused to give her $35,000. I explained that I would return to Sweden at Christmas and file for a divorce. I also asked her to sign a listing agreement to sell the house which she refused.
Q = MR OUSKY My lawyer
A = MS LORENTE Petitioner
MS WOLD = Petitioners lawyer
Q. Other than this instance, what has Axel ever done to cause you to believe that he might abduct the children.A. His threats about doing it. The fact that he emptied our bank accounts and took all our savings from.. and even cashed in my insurance policy this summer. So I know he's getting ready to leave. And that is very threatening to me because I have no means of following him.
Q. Now, he has said he intends to return to Sweden, correct?
A. Well he has said that to you, not to me.
Q. You're saying that during this process was the first time that you learned that he intended--
A. Yes, that he had made up his mind to leave for Sweden. He was always threatening me with the fact that he could leave any time, but until now, I didn't have a date, you know.
Q. And so when you talk about threats to abduct the children, he's talking about taking the children back to Sweden?
A. Mm-hmm, and he could very easily do that any time he wanted to.
Q. Okay. Now, you and Axel almost got a divorce last June of '95, correct.
A. Last-- what do you mean last June of '95.
Q. Well, in June of '95 the two of you --
A. Oh, yes, we had been talking about divorce for the past two years.
Q. And at that time you had worked out a kind of divorce and separation agreement, correct?
A. No, that's not correct.
Q. You don't recall typing up an agreement regarding --
A. Yes I did.
Q. Okay
A. But it didn't work out.
Q. I Understand. I need this marked as an exhibit, please.
Q. Showing you what has been marked as Exhibit 2, is that the typewritten note that we were just talking about?
MS WOLD: Can I look at that before you answer that question?
A. You know, there's a paragraph here that I didn't write.
Q. Which paragraph is that? Can you tell me how it starts?
A. This has been tampered with.
Q. Okay, tell me what paragraph is in there that shouldn't be in there.
A. Can I have a pen? It would be much easier for me.
Q. I need to have you describe it for the record.
A. Yes I will, once I mark it on my --- is this copy for me?
Q. I'm going to let you write on a copy.
A. Because I need -- this is not what I wrote, but I need to -- Okay, I did not write this first paragraph.
Q. And when you say first paragraph, you mean the paragraph that starts "I cannot take" --
A. "I cannot " mm-hmm. I did not write that.
Q. So anything from the words "I cannot" all the way to "provider" should be deleted?
A. Yes, it's not true.
Q. Other than that paragraph?
A. Let me finish reading, because I'm checking. The second paragraph "I would like to see them", that has been tampered with. I don't recall my exact words because this was a while back, but I did say in this paragraph that we could talk about having custody of the children, holidays and vacations, and trying to make it as easy on them as possible.
Q. Regardless of the exact wording, I mean the gist of it was that you agreed that Axel would have the primary custody?
A. No, I never agreed to that in my life. I never would.
Q. So you are saying everything else in here is accurate, but that was, what, reversed?
A. Yes
Q. What did it actually say before?
A. I can't remember the exact words. I wish I had a copy of it, you know, the original note that I wrote. Maybe I can find it in the computer. I will certainly try.
Q. What do you believe it said regarding custody?
A. It didn't say anything regarding custody because I was assuming that the children would stay with me, that he could visit them or we could make, you know, life as comfortable as possible for the children, something like that.
Q. And did you talk about where the children would reside?
A. I do that later on. "I will look for an apartment and a job and as soon as I find them, I will leave." I will take my children, my clothes, my car, books. You know, it's so funny that the word children is missing there.
Q. But you had agreed to move into an apartment.
A. Yes, because obviously I can not afford to pay $1,400 a month for mortgage. The part about while I look for a job and an apartment and stuff like that, I said something else there, but I don't remember right now.
Q. Let me, because it appears that there's a number of things that you're going through, I'll ask you about some specific statements.
A. Yeah, please do.
Q. The statement on page 2 that says, "Once I'm done with school I will try to be as close as possible to the children." Did you say that?
A. Yeah.
Q. "In the meantime, I have to agree to whatever conditions you set"?
A. Yeah, but you see, this has all been tampered with, because there was something about -- "If next year you decide to move back to Sweden, we will have to make this separation legal."
Q. But did you make the statement, "In the meantime, I have to agree to whatever conditions you set"?
A. In the meantime, I was refering to in the meantime while I finish school, which was a year.--
Q. I see.
A. And before that I said, you know, that we could share the house and the children and just live together as adults, although not legally married if he wanted that. You know, this has been tampered with. This is not the note I wrote. And I have no idea -- I would have to spend time reading this to make sure.
In the computer it says that her proposal was created July 12, 1995 2:40 Am and last modified July 12, 1995 16:14 Pm. That was when she printed it, put it on the kitchen table and left the house.